A Special Message for Long-Time YL Friends...

A Special Message for Long-Time YL Friends...
We love our long-time Young Living friends - including those who had other things on the priority list for a time and now would like to replenish a few things. This is your chance to jump back in, and get a little bit extra to help you use your oils in the best possible way! 
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Marriage Tips That Might Make Your Mother Blush

Marriage Tips That Might Make Your Mother Blush
This is a post for mature audiences - the already-married or nearly-married set. These are the marriage tips no one else is gonna give you. 

And we’re just going to go there today - I’m going to give you ten tips for a good married life. Step inside to find better communication, and a blow-your-mind, T-level boosting, libido-boosting, sex-enhancing blend that will rock your bedroom life! We don't need details on what happens next, but would love to see baby pictures!

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tlevels, libido, bedroom, essential oils, marriage, goodmarriage

Navigating Junior High in a Homeschool World

Navigating Junior High in a Homeschool World
We're going to play a game with the pictures in this post today: How many kids in the shot are "junior high"? Have fun with it - and maybe look back on your own junior high years of awkwardness with a little more kindness than you may have in the past. You couldn't help it. You were ... Junior High. Let's talk about how we handle the changes that our children go through during those junior high years, particularly with an eye on their education. (With some essential oil suggestions at the end to help you keep your sanity!)


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Meeting on Common Ground

Meeting on Common Ground










This was originally something I wrote when we had only 4 children, but seems like a good one to repeat here (with a few adjustments for wisdom and age) being that our oldest son was just married a few weeks ago. I would love to think that they will never have incidents of disagreement but, let's be real, marriage is work, and sometimes we don't hear one another well or have a poor understanding - and hopefully these tips will be of some use to them when the time comes.

The other night though, I annoyed Jeff a bit, as married folks do at times. The cause of what annoyed him is not the point of this post. The aftereffect of our late-night discussion is the point. One of the things we decided early on in our marriage was to follow the adage of not going to bed angry - or really even in disharmony with one another over an issue. Accordingly, we came to a more agreeable state before looking to sleep at around 4 a.m. (we didn't get into the discussion until 3 so it didn't keep us up too much later than we might have been anyway.) But as I laid back down, I noticed that while our queen-sized bed normally feels cozy, on this occasion, we were both just far enough away from one another to create a gap in the covers, and a cold one at that. All of a sudden, the bed was downright roomy but not in a comfortable way!

THAT is the point of this post:

a minor annoyance can put a mountainous wedge between two people, even when they love one another.

What a problem that wedge can be when we haven't predetermined how we'll deal with it! Just as a metal wedge is used to split huge logs, a mental wedge can split apart friendships, marriages, sibling relationships, business partnerships... One of the things I strive to teach our children is that it is not only what we say and do to another person that can make the difference in how things turn out, but also even our overall attitude about that person or situation. If I take the attitude that my position is the "right" position, no matter what, then in the end, I am bound to lose, "no matter what" because my attitude will become an invisible wedge in the situation.


If I open my mind to what the other person is saying and really try to hear that person, I am more open to the possibility of reconciliation. In the end the relationship may not work out or be what is best, regardless of my position on things, but it is important to at least make that effort to understand where the other person is coming from, and where I may be wrong in my own standing.

As an aside for my children and their future spouses: overcoming your pride and recognizing that you may be W-R-O-N-G can help ensure that you have very few nights with cold feet and a gap in the covers!

 
In other words: learn to listen, learn to let go of your pride, learn to say, "I'm sorry." Finally, never go to bed annoyed with one another - at least try to talk it out and come to a middle ground on which to continue later.

One of the things I have trained myself to do in difficult discussions is take a second to block out what the other person is saying, and inwardly pray for humility and a humble enough heart that I'll hear where I am wrong, and to be given the words I need to say that will help the other person hear what they need. Then... I shut off my mind, and my pride, and my hurt and opinions - and try to just be in that moment to hear what I need to hear, and to live out that prayer I just said. This has diffused many hard conversations with more than one person. 

And finally...
 don't go to bed angry. 

Releasing Emotional Baggage and Trauma

Releasing Emotional Baggage and Trauma
Did you know that your body stores, and continues to react to, the emotional blows of your past? How do you let those past hurts go and begin to move forward? This is only one suggestion in a fuller toolbox, but might be a way to get started on healing and more balanced health. 
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